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All or nothin’. If you’re not first, you’re last. Go big or go home. Good or bad. This weekend, I heard a favourite human say the familiar sentence “Oh, well, I’ll get back on track Monday” in reference to eating. It’s familiar because I’ve said it a millions times myself. Along with a few of the doozies below. It infers, at least, in my case, that I’ve-taken-an-action-that-doesn’t-align-with-my-goal-therefore-the-whole-day/week/month-is-blown. It got me thinking about dichotomous thinking and how it’s not an issue until it is. And when it is, that that self-induced baloney doesn’t serve us very well. Sneaky AppearancesAn easy example of those all-or-nothing moments is when it comes to nutrition with our “I’’ll start again Monday”, “I fell off-track”, “cheat meals” and “I was bad to eat XYZ.” (Uuugh, no thank you to that kind of thinking). But then my mind went down the rabbit hole, and I realized with humility, that this mindset has been sneaky and appears elsewhere in my thinking and habits, often driving actions. Finances: “I only have 10$ left, might as well get a fancy latte since that won’t make a dent in my debt.” Workday: “I was late starting work, the meeting was chaotic, the day is blown. Tomorrow I’ll do better and make up for it.” Task/Project: “If I only had a week off, I could get ahead. It’s impossible otherwise.” Exercise: “I slept in, looks like I’m skipping my workout.”
How is all-or-nothing thinking creeping into your life? Is it impacting you negatively? Impacting those around you? Is it setting the example you want to set? Is it stopping or slowing you from embracing your own big life? Re-frame and Nerd Out What works for me are two things; re-framing and tracking so that I can see the trends. Re-frame: You’re not an all to nothing type of person. You’re an acceptable-minimums-because-that’s-still-progress-and-putting-myself-first type of person. There is BIG LIFE power in our acceptable minimums. An example of an acceptable minimum in my own life? If I don’t have time to walk 10,000 steps, then walking around the block in the morning is great. An acceptable minimum. Something to feel good about. Why? Because it still aligns with my goals and who I see myself as - a healthy person that loves getting outside as much as possible. Trends: Just ask any millionaire, habit coach, or nutritionist worth their salt - a little goes a long way. If fact, consistently doing a little goes further than sporadic big efforts. Perspective Makeover Finances: Every 5$ not spent on fancy lattes is 5$ less of debt, and 5$ closer to savings, and 5$ closer to compounding interest and 5$-plus-compound-interest closer to hitting my financial goals. It turns into a game of sorts to track the debt reduction and savings, seeing the graphs incrementally make positive progress. Workday: Here’s a re-frame plus hack for you, turn off any notifications and distractions, use a timer, set it to 30 mins and get some small work tasks done. Feel good after the 30 mins? Stretch, reset the timer, and go again. Task/Project: One of the many things I learned from author and developmental editor AJ Harper at her Top Three Book Workshop, is that books can, and are, written in daily 5/15/30/60 minute increments. You don’t need a vast amount of concentrated time at a cabin, just a daily practice of writing a little at a time to create a masterpiece. I mean, cabins are nice, but unless I win the lotto… Exercise: This habit setting game changer is a tip author James Clear (see below) shared in a recent podcast interview - instead of foregoing the workout, do a quick 10 minute HIIT instead. Or 5 minutes of skipping. Or 1 minute of squats. The idea is to keep the healthy habit, just shorten the time. You’re still a person that works out daily (or whatever the goal is) regardless or whether it’s 1 hour or 1 minute.
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